December 7, 2009

26. It seems I’ve moved from one addiction to another.

Posted in Uncategorized at 8:31 pm by dawnfields310

At first it was very hard to be without my tv.  Then once I started renting movies I felt better.  But it was costing a lot of money because I started replacing my tv watching time with movie watching time.  I was renting 4-6 movies a day 3-4 days a week.  Now I realize this whole thing is really about denial and avoidance.

I have become way too closed off and shelter myself most of the time within my four walls.  Now that I am aware, I am trying to rent fewer movies.  My goal with the project was to take all the wasted time I was spending watching tv and put it to better use.  Mainly, my film projects.  Today I did better because it was the 63rd anniversary of a disaster I am making a documentary about and it got me ramped up again.  But if I had been spending my time more wisely this past month, I would have been ready with a finished web site and some press materials of my own, considering several newspapers around the country covered the story, but instead had nothing. Another missed opportunity.

I’m going to try very hard over the next few weeks to really concentrate and get back on track.